Sitting by the sea my last night alone in Fort Lauderdale before we move into a 23 ft. camper for an unknown amount of time. I keep thinking about the journey I am about to embark on. Not a physical one, but the emotional and mental one. Tonight more then ever, I so strongly keep feeling a pull. A pull in total opposite directions and ways to live my life. I feel a pull towards continuing to numb feelings and fears by acquiring more things, things, things and then the quiet, deep feeling within my soul of truth whispering that that is not the right way. That the way to happiness is not thru things but in living life according to what I know to be true. Seeking to actually live my life, be in the moment, be grateful for all I already have - which is all I need.
Here I sit on the beach with the sun setting in front of me and my bike next to me. Barefoot, listening to the waves, smelling the salty sea air and feeling the soft breeze on my face and I am embarrassed to share that I didn't actually plan on coming here this evening...
I had gotten home from work, quickly unpacked and took my bike out this evening to go to the mall for a few cute new things to have with me in the camper since we leave in 2 days. I even locked my bike up and went inside but the mall was already closed. Now, as I look around at this tranquil moment I cannot believe how often I trade in beautiful times like this when I go on the search for more things I don't truly need.
I know for sure that nature is what speaks to my soul. So it is of utmost importance to remember this next time I have the urge to fill a void with trivial, egotistical things. I want to remember always to seek out still moments like what I stumbled upon tonight. Moments like these is what I hope to create more and more of, as often as possible.
Nature reminds me to simply be still and to be grateful.
